The need for us as a community to deepen our awareness and understanding of the experience and impact of grief was a recurring thread in our discussions. Themes that emerged that find support in the literature include:
- Grief is a broad phenomenon that arises due to death of a significant person in our life.
- Grief may be experienced differently depending on circumstances that lead to the loss. Whether the loss was gradual, following a period of caregiving, or sudden, does not necessarily mean it is harder or easier, but needs related to work could differ.
- There can be additional barriers to healing from grief when a loss has occurred from violent events, connects to stigmatized social phenomenon (e.g., suicide, overdose, etc.), or when grieving a difficult or conflicted relationship.
- Grief impacts the brain both in the immediate aftermath of loss and over the longer term, including through but not limited to the disruption of memory, attention, executive function, and the speed of information processing. This needs to be considered in evaluating expectations and ensuring adequate support. See this article from the American Brain Foundation for more information.
- Talking about grief in professional settings might be perceived by some as taboo. This can challenge the way support is offered/or sought in two important ways. First, colleagues might not feel at ease checking in on someone who has experienced a loss, fearing that this might upset them or that such an approach might be viewed as intrusive. Second, the colleague who is navigating grief might feel compelled to refrain from talking about what they are experiencing in the workplace. The outcome can be extremely difficult for the colleague who is grieving, causing them to feel invisible and isolated, which can add to their existing sense of loss.
Understanding grief’s timeline:
Feelings of loss and grief may begin to emerge even before someone dies as in the case of caring for someone with failing health.
Feelings can intensify or diminish immediately following a death or even long after a death has occurred. In all cases we might expect a long-term impact on productivity. But the impact may set in at different times for different people (someone may plow through work in the immediate aftermath of a death-related loss but then begin to feel the impact of the loss six months to one year later when the reality has set in and when some of the task related issues have been completed).
Anniversaries, birthdays, and other reminders may cause grief related emotions to resurface. Planning and accommodating for this could be a useful strategy (decline work related meetings; plan a day of self-care).
Grief is individual: not everyone reacts the same way or experiences the same needs. Persons experiencing grief need to be listened to and respected in their grieving process. Colleagues and leaders should check in while respecting privacy and desires from the person experiencing grief to share their feelings or not.
